When your relationship has deteriorated to the point that you and your spouse are no longer communicating at a healthy level, it may seem inevitable that filing for divorce is your only option left. Rather than give in and drown your marriage in separation agreements and legal battles, take a deep breath and step back for a moment.
Just when you think the final straw has broken the camel’s back and the grounds for divorce are stronger than reason to hope and resolve your issues, there are still opportunities for you and your spouse to salvage the marriage and work toward a lasting and fulfilling relationship.
Here are some important tips to help you and your spouse work together to get the marriage help necessary to prevent divorce:
- If you decide to consult a marital therapist, be thorough in asking questions, specifically about their training and expertise in marriage counseling. Don’t be shy. Ask until you can’t ask any more. Be certain that whomever you choose to help guide your marriage conflict resolution is skilled, respectful and above all else trustworthy. The health and survival of your marriage is at stake
- Resist the temptation of filing for divorce as soon as all seems lost. Take some time apart and determine what aspects of your marriage are missing. What passions and goals aren’t being supported?
- Take time away from the kids, work and any pressures or stress-related activities that could be contributing to the growing rift. Take a vacation and see if you and your spouse can rekindle the physical and emotional attachment that has been dulled by marital problems.
- Learn to talk and actively listen again. Marriage problems often arise when couples forget how to communicate respectfully and honestly, as well as constructively argue without pointing fingers and placing blame.
Finding marriage help from within the confines of your relationship may seem next to impossible, but don’t give up. Often it’s surprising how that simply taking a step away from your troubles to gain valuable perspective can go a long way toward providing better insight into what is causing your marital problems. If all else feels lost, then consider professional marriage counseling as an opportunity to discover how to work together again with a gentle nudge from a trained professional.
Contact us to learn how A New Beginning can help get you and your spouse on the road again to a loving marriage.